How to Get Him Back: 3 Ways to Help Keep on His Mind

When your boyfriend breaks up with you, there are so many emotions flying about and things running in your mind. One of the most common questions that are asked is, “How do I get him back?” Accomplishing that goal can be tough because you don’t want to chase after him, looking desperate and completely needy. However, all you want is to stay in his mind. Yet, how can you do this?

There are several ways you can stay on his mind. When you utilize these steps, you are helping your cause and yourself. You want to stay on his mind in a positive manner.

–  The first and most important tip to know is to not talk to him

Yes, you read correctly. Do not speak with your ex boyfriend for about a month. Contact that keeps being initiated only brings on more problems and issues to an already painful wound.  Leave him be for that month so both of you can cool down and step back from the relationship. By giving him this time away, you make him miss you. Remember that absence does make the heart grow fonder but this can’t occur if you are always in his face. By being away, he’ll second guess himself about why he dumped you.

–  The second thing you should be doing is work on your appearance

Try something different like a new hairstyle. Buy some clothes compliment your curves. If you don’t like the way you look because of your weight, go on a diet, join a gym or maybe do both. If you hate the way you look when you smile, it’s time to you’re your teeth whitened or go to a dentist. Those annoying things that you never thought about when you were with your boyfriend will gnaw away at you. The goal is to look hot and get his attention again.

–  The third thing you should do is get out there and gets a social life

This is especially true if you want your ex to be jealous of you. Get together with some friends and get social again. Grab some attention from other men. You don’t have to date them seriously but you need to feel attractive and having a good time. Partying may be the last thing you really want to do but you can’t sit around, feeling sorry for yourself. Besides you want your ex to see you looking like the breakup didn’t affect you.

It may be a trick to get your ex back but it works. Once he sees or hears about you looking your best and how you have been doing, it’ll be in his mind in no time. He’ll wonder why you aren’t missing him. If you are getting plenty of attention from other men, the chances of him giving you some attention too is there. Dating is good but you don’t have to be serious. If your ex gets wind of it, he’ll get naturally jealous. All of this will make you feel better about yourself too.

What his impression will be is that you are moving on without him and he wasn’t everything he thought he was in the relationship. That may sound cruel but the trick is to get him to think about you and giving the relationship a second go round. Besides you were hurt when he broke up with you right? So the end justifies the means. You’ll make him crazy thinking about you while you worked on fixing yourself and your confidence.

Will you be moving on if you go through with this all? There is that possibility. Wouldn’t it be nice to have him come back to you, begging for another chance and then you have the power of deciding if it’s even worth it. You no longer have to ask yourself “how do I get him back” but “do I even want him back?”

Real Touching Story on “Marriage”

I got this story from a friend via email and I like to share it with you. It brought tears to my eyes…


When I got home that night as my wife served dinner, I held her hand and said, “I’ve got something to tell you.” She sat down and ate quietly. Again I observed the hurt in her eyes.

Suddenly I didn’t know how to open my mouth. But I had to let her know what I was thinking. I want a divorce. I raised the topic calmly.

She didn’t seem to be annoyed by my words, instead she asked me softly, “Why?”

I avoided her question. This made her angry. She threw away the chopsticks and shouted at me, “You are not a man!”

That night, we didn’t talk to each other. She was weeping. I knew she wanted to find out what had happened to our marriage. But I could hardly give her a satisfactory answer; she had lost my heart to Jane. I didn’t love her anymore. I just pitied her!

With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement which stated that she could own our house, our car, and 30% stake of my company.

She glanced at it and then tore it into pieces. The woman who had spent ten years of her life with me had become a stranger. I felt sorry for her wasted time, resources and energy but I could not take back what I had said for I loved Jane so dearly. Finally she cried loudly in front of me, which was what I had expected to see. To me her cry was actually a kind of release. The idea of divorce which had obsessed me for several weeks seemed to be firmer and clearer now.

The next day, I came back home very late and found her writing something at the table. I didn’t have supper but went straight to sleep and fell asleep very fast because I was tired after an eventful day with Jane.

When I woke up, she was still there at the table writing. I just did not care so I turned over and was asleep again.

In the morning she presented her divorce conditions: She didn’t want anything from me, but needed a month’s notice before the divorce. She requested that in that one month we both struggle to live as normal a life as possible. Her reasons were simple: Our son had his exams in a month’s time and she didn’t want to disrupt him with our broken marriage.

This was agreeable to me. But she had something more, she asked me to recall how I had carried her into out bridal room on our wedding day.

She requested that every day for the month’s duration I carry her out of our bedroom to the front door ever morning. I thought she was going crazy. Just to make our last days together bearable I accepted her odd request.

I told Jane about my wife’s divorce conditions. She laughed loudly and thought it was absurd. “No matter what tricks she applies, she has to face the divorce,” she said scornfully.

My wife and I hadn’t had any body contact since my divorce intention was explicitly expressed. So when I carried her out on the first day, we both appeared clumsy. Our son clapped behind us, “Daddy is holding mommy in his arms.” His words brought me a sense of pain. From the bedroom to the sitting room, then to the door, I walked over ten meters with her in my arms. She closed her eyes and said softly, “Don’t tell our son about the divorce.” I nodded, feeling somewhat upset. I put her down outside the door. She went to wait for the bus to work. I drove alone to the office.

On the second day, both of us acted much more easily. She leaned on my chest. I could smell the fragrance of her blouse. I realized that I hadn’t looked at this woman carefully for a long time. I realized she was not young any more. There were fine wrinkles on her face, her hair was greying! Our marriage had taken its toll on her. For a minute I wondered what I had done to her.

On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I felt a sense of intimacy returning. This was the woman who had given ten years of her life to me.

On the fifth and sixth day, I realized that our sense of intimacy was growing again. I didn’t tell Jane about this. It became easier to carry her as the month slipped by. Perhaps the everyday workout made me stronger.

She was choosing what to wear one morning. She tried on quite a few dresses but could not find a suitable one. Then she sighed, “All my dresses have grown bigger.” I suddenly realized that she had grown so thin, that was the reason why I could carry her more easily.

Suddenly it hit me… She had buried so much pain and bitterness in her heart. Subconsciously I reached out and touched her head.

Our son came in at the moment and said, “Dad, it’s time to carry mom out.” To him, seeing his father carrying his mother out had become an essential part of his life. My wife gestured to our son to come closer and hugged him tightly. I turned my face away because I was afraid I might change my mind at this last minute. I then held her in my arms, walking from the bedroom, through the sitting room, to the hallway. Her hand surrounded my neck softly and naturally. I held her body tightly; it was just like our wedding day.

But her much lighter weight made me sad. On the last day, when I held her in my arms I could hardly move a step. Our son had gone to school. I held her tightly and said, “I hadn’t noticed that our life lacked intimacy.”

I drove to office…jumped out of the car swiftly without locking the door. I was afraid any delay would make me change my mind… I walked upstairs. Jane opened the door and I said to her, “Sorry, Jane, I do not want the divorce anymore.”

She looked at me, astonished, and then touched my forehead. “Do you have a fever?” she said. I moved her hand off my head. “Sorry, Jane,” I said. “I won’t divorce. My marriage life was boring probably because she and I didn’t value the details of our lives, not because we didn’t love each other anymore. Now I realize that since I carried her into my home on our wedding day I am supposed to hold her until death do us apart.”

Jane seemed to suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud slap and then slammed the door and burst into tears. I walked downstairs and drove away.

At the floral shop on the way, I ordered a bouquet of flowers for my wife. The salesgirl asked me what to write on the card. I smiled and wrote: I’ll carry you out every morning until death do us apart.

That evening I arrived home, flowers in my hands, a smile on my face, I run up stairs, only to find my wife in the bed – dead.

My wife had been fighting CANCER for months and I was so busy with Jane to even notice. She knew that she would die soon and she wanted to save me from the whatever negative reaction from our son, in case we push thru with the divorce. At least, in the eyes of our son – I’m a loving husband…

The small details of your lives are what really matter in a relationship. It is not the mansion, the car, property, and the money in the bank. These create an environment conducive for happiness but cannot give happiness in themselves. So find time to be your spouse’s friend and do those little things for each other that build intimacy. Do have a real happy marriage!

“I felt so devastated, enraged and humiliated. I never dreamed I could save my marriage, let along trust him again…” – Kathie Brown

A step-by-step system for saving your relationship after it’s been shattered by an affair.


Secrets to Winning Back Your Boyfriend

Breaking up can be a very painful process for both you and your ex-boyfriend.  It can be made even more difficult, if after you breakup with him, you realize that it was a mistake.  Is it possible to win back a boyfriend when you are the one that initiated the breakup?  The answer is yes; however, you will need to be very careful about the steps you take to get him back.

Be Patient

It takes a while for most people to heal the wounds caused by a breakup.  Give your ex boyfriend time to get over the worst of his hurt and anger before you approach him about getting back together.  If you barrage him with a series of phone calls or text messages before he is ready, it will simply make him angry all over again. This will set you back.

Take it slow and reintroduce the possibility of reconciliation slowly.  Give him time to think about the possibility before going any further.  Give him the time needed to get past the hurt so he can clearly remember the good times you two shared together; then maybe he will be willing to listen.

Write It Out

When you think he is ready to hear it, write down your feelings and give them to him.  A written apology and/or explanation is the better way to go.  That way you can be sure that you say what you really want to say.  Sometimes when we try to have conversations about emotional topics, the emotions get in our way and we do not say everything we really want to.

Take your time writing this letter.  It can be a very successful first step but only if it comes across as sincere.  Make sure that it says exactly what you want it to but do not fill it full of a lot of excess begging or silliness.

Take Care of Yourself

While you are waiting to make your move, take the time to make yourself a better person.  Keep yourself physically fit and make sure that you eat healthy.  Many people deal with the emptiness in their lives behind eating empty calorie foods. If you do not take steps to avoid it, you may be asking your ex boyfriend to take back a larger version of yourself.

Do not make him the inspiration for your activity.  Do it for yourself.  If you only do it for him then if the reconciliation does not work out, you will rapidly regress back into your former self.

Tell Him You Want Him Back

Once you have taken the time for both you and him to recover from the breakup, tell him that you would like to try again.  Now is not the time for subtlety.  Make it as clear as you can without coming across as desperate or commandeering.  Once you have made your intentions clear, you may want to give him some more time to decide how he feels about the idea.  If you are afraid that he is not ready to hear it from you, feel free to send one of your girlfriends on a mission of mercy.  Have them tell him that you would like to get back with him and see how he reacts.

Get Boyfriend To Commit With The Right Approach

It is very easy to find yourself in a dating relationship where the man seems afraid of disturbing the status quo. This can be very frustrating if you would like your relationship to move forward into a serious commitment. Do you have to resign yourself to the situation and wait for when he will finally be ready to pop the big question? Or should you leave him in his stagnation and find someone new? None of these choices is good, and it is not a matter of choosing a lesser evil. There are definite steps you can take in order to take control of the situation and get him to commit.

commitment phobic manAlthough it is something that frustrates many of us, dealing with a boyfriend who seems afraid of committing is not really complicated. The problem is that many women usually go about it the wrong way, making things even worse. If you are in such a situation, you should use the right approach and the man will be yours.

Don’t push

One of the biggest mistakes that many of us do is to try to make the men see the sense by talking about the issue incessantly. Your boyfriend will interpret this as your attempt to push him into a corner, and he won’t thank you for it. When he notices that you are trying to force him with the idea of marriage, he will become even more resistant.

Remove commitment out of your mind and plans

The best way to influence your boyfriend to seriously get him to commit is to actually steer clear of the subject. Show the man through your actions that you are not thinking about marriage. You should not just avoid making comments about your own marriage but even those of your friends. Anything that will bring the issue to mind should be avoided, including the books you read and programs you watch.

Make your own plans

Instead of focusing on marriage, make your own plans that will take you away from him. For instance, you may go out with your girlfriends instead of him.

Such steps will make the man realize that you have an independent life and he risks losing you if he does not get serious. As a result, he will take measures towards making a commitment.

As you can see, there are simple things that you can do to get him to commit to you. You just have to go about it the right way and you will find that it is fairly simple.

Getting Him From Someone Else’s Arms

When a relationship ends, it leaves behind scars of pain, confusion and even resentment.  These scars can heal and people can move on.  However, sometimes moving on is not on the agenda because you can’t stop loving and wanting him.

It’s a normal reaction to finally being alone after some time. This is even more so if you know your ex is already seeing someone else and you are left with no choices.  Thinking of getting your ex back seems impossible…This is not necessarily so.

Just because he is with someone else, it doesn’t mean the door is closed and locked.  There might be a way you can get him back again.

If he’s already chosen to be with someone else then it’s extremely likely that he’s done this on the rebound. That kind of relationship is usually short-lived and is largely entered into as a temporary replacement for the serious one that has just ended and as a source of solace and support.  It doesn’t mean he has moved on.  It means he’s trying to.

Have confidence in yourself and your history together.  Make a resolve to wait it out patiently and make sure he continues to see you at your best… in terms of how you look and in what you say and what you do.

By doing this, it will give him strong and consistent reminders of everything he ever saw in you.  Then, if his fledgling relationship is indeed failing to take flight, those reminders might be the things that send him back into your arms.  As the saying goes, you never know what you’ve got till it’s gone.

I’m In Love With Someone Outside My Control

Be careful if you’re in love with someone who is “outside of my control”.
Determined to get him back…
He is the love of my life…
I will never let him go again…

Although they may be true, there are ramifications to saying these things to yourself or to others.

Firstly, It screams desperation. Although it’s good to be determined and ambitious in your career, a relationship is not like a career.

Secondly, There are so many factors and moving parts to a relationship that you can never have 100% control over it, no matter how much you want to believe you can.

In fact, most people feel the most PAIN in their relationships because of the lack of control that naturally come from being in a relationship.

If you want to be happy, whether it’s with a man, with your kids or with your family and friends, you need to learn to be flexible and free-flowing like water.

If you’re like water, you flow naturally with whatever path or course changes along the way. You can alter yourself or your ideals and beliefs about your life so it suits you instead of goes against you.

You can adapt to these changing and moving parts much more readily.

You can also be FREE to move around and change in any direction you want to go.

And if you want to attract men – being free is POWER.


relationship helpBecause most women aren’t like this. They are either so stuck in their ways, that they want to control everything around them, or they are so forgiving and understanding that they turn into pushovers, who can’t think for themselves.

Neither types are truly free.

Men can see quickly whether a woman is truly free or not. Often when men find a woman like this, he will quickly want to MARRY her and never let her go.

This is because being with a woman like this means HE can be free too. With men, it’s all about being a man, making their own choices, doing what is right for them, being FREE. Often women just want to control and keep men in a box so they can’t get out or run away. But the truth is really the opposite.

If a man feels he is free in a relationship, he will happily devote himself to a woman BECAUSE of that reason.

Making Up – Mistakes That Ruin Your Chance

If you want another chance making up with your ex, it can be a bit tough. When you have a breakup, the way you would typically act is replaced with a frustrating or stressful attitude. You don’t behave as you would normally under breakup stress. For that reason, care should be taken when dealing with people who are suffering heartbreak.

When your senses are askew, it’s natural to act on your first impulses but it’s really the wrong thing to do. However, if you’re trying to make up with your ex, there are a couple of things you should not do. They are: be desperate and over aggressive.

Making up with your ex mistake (1) – Desperation

If you act like you are desperate to getting back together with your ex, it’s actually a tactic that backfires. All you come off as is clingy or needy. These tend to make an ex want to run away rather come back into your arms. It may be difficult to accept but it is actually the real truth. If you want another chance with your ex, avoid acting desperate and be yourself.

Making up with your ex mistake (2) – Over Aggressive

You have to remember that your feelings may be hurt, your ex has his or her feelings too. If you want another chance with your ex, then you should avoid words of resentment and anger. Those unsympathetic words or even actions will send your ex running for the hills. Wouldn’t you run too? So don’t be surprised if this happens to you.

You may not realize it but the choices you make above are not done intentionally. Rather, they are done out of hurt, spite and anger. Unfortunately, they can ruin having another chance making up with your ex. If you really want another chance with your ex, you need to keep your feelings in check and devise some sort of plan to win your ex’s heart once again.

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Get Back Together With No Contact Rule Work?

When you have been dumped, it may seem impossible to pick up the pieces and keep moving. You may feel like life isn’t worth living without getting your ex back by your side. Is it hard for you to wake up in the morning or go to bed in the evening? However, there is a solution to get your ex back by your side and put your life together once again.

Get back together with my ex possible?

The first and most important step to get your ex back by your side is to cut off any sort of contact. There are several reasons for you to do this. Listed below are 4 reasons to do so:

(1) Prevents the possibility of negative things being said especially during fights.

(2) Ability and time to cool down, leaving you time to get a grip on your life.

(3) Gives them an opportunity to miss you and you miss them.

(4) Time to get organized with an action plan to win him or her back.

You need to understand that by having no contact with him or her means absolutely no contact. No letters, no e-mail, no text messaging, no phone calls and no visits of any kind. It means you give up cold turkey until the month or so is up. Don’t go to places that you know he or she attends frequently either.

Your second step is to overhaul yourself during this break. Why feeling a painful loss is normal and natural, you should still go out and do the things you were doing before. Be with friends and family who are close to you. People who stay depressed after a breakup hurt more in the short term.

When you are ready to get your ex back by your side after a month, you need to think clearly and be level-headed. Contact him or her (once the month is up) with a plan in mind. You may find yourself struggling to win him or her back difficult without one. A plan versus no plans will leave you hoping that what you say and do will get your ex back by your side.

How To Tell If A Guy Likes You – Telltale Signs

However much you may be interested in a certain guy, you will only end up frustrated if you try to get his attention while he does not like you. It will be a waste of precious time and energy to go for such a man. This means that you should know how you can tell the guy you should vest your interest in.

First of all, here are some signs that will tell if a guy likes you or not, so you should be on your guard.

* Downright harsh teasing
* Saying negative things concerning you
* Abusive
* Clear signs of misuse, for instance, only being close when he wants something from you

These are warning signals, telling you to be prepared for heartache if you decide to proceed with the relationship.

make men fall in loveIt is not only important for you to know these signs, but also how to know if he likes you. Although every guy is unique, and there is no single pattern into which all fall, there are some common signs that will tell you the general direction things are taking.

Ask the guy

You can decide to be forthright about it and ask him to tell you the truth. There is just one main problem with this approach. No one enjoys being rejected, yet there are chances of going through this experience. However, whether he says if he likes you or not, you won’t go through nearly endless suspense as you wonder about his stance. You won’t try to punch a hole through a brick wall anyway.

Still, you can reach quite a sound conclusion even before the guy tells you about his feelings. Here are the 5 telltale signs.

1. Blushing
People tend to think that only women blush. The truth is that a guy who is interested in you will tend to blush when you meet.

2. Looking at you
A guy who likes you will tend to stare at you a lot. However, be aware that a stalker will also look at you.

3. Trying to get your attention
A man who likes you will do some things just to attract your attention.

4. Stammering
You may notice that the guy gets unusual stammer when he speaks with you.

5. Dilated pupils
When you are close enough, you may notice that his pupils dilate. However, do not be fooled with the natural dilation due to dim light.

A guy who likes you will also tease you jokingly and will laugh at your jokes.

What Does Your Ex REALLY Want From You?

Did you know that more than 70% of men can’t answer this question? What’s worse is that most women can’t either. So with this in mind is it any wonder you find yourself not being able to get through to your girl and do or say the things that will get you back together? Or worse… doing the things that push her further away?

“…avoiding crucial mistakes while attempting to get an ex-girlfriend back is just as important –
if not more important – as taking the right approach.”

Here’s a little *secret*.
This is something I consider to be the SECOND MOST IMPORTANT factor in getting your girlfriend back:

*** Never listen to what a woman says… Watch what she does instead

Everything that’s going on in your breakup right now is the result of mixed signals. For example, has she told you she still loves you?

What does this do to you? It gets your hopes up and gets you thinking there’s a good chance you’ll be together again. But when you try to make amends she hits you with a bunch of reasons why it’s better to remain friends. The harder you try, the more she pulls away.

But if you could just “read between the lines” you would see that what’s really happening is that she loves and wants to be with the person she met in the first place – not the person this breakup has led you to become.

So what’s the solution here? It’s to get yourself back in the same shape as when you first met her.
Think about it? Were you thinking and acting like this on your first dates? Didn’t think so…

Now this requires you to step back from your situation, look at it from a realistic point of view
(see Common Mistake #1 in the report) and then just put the pieces of the puzzle together:

* What were you like before you got together? * How did you change during the relationship?
* What has this breakup ultimately turned you into?

Taking the time to really think about and answer those questions and then taking actions to correct the obvious mistakes you made on your part is a crucial step to getting her back.

What Sex Mean to a Relationship? Men Think Sex Means Relationship?

You may be wondering that men do think of s^e^x as equal to relationship? Are you looking forward to finding a guy who wants more than wanting your body only? You are looking for a long-term relationship and not one night stand?

These issues are important for many women. They want a relationship that is serious and for the long-term. There are also ladies who think that when men think of s^e^x as relationship but it’s not always so.

In the past

intimate relationshipIn the olden days, having intimate relationship is serious and was recorded before a wedding but this is not the case now. This means that it is very difficult to decide whether men think sex means relationship. Some of us are conservative, which meant that if a guy slept with a woman then he would be expected to marry her. Virginity was very important, but, nowadays s^e^x is not something that we save for the wedding day.

 There is no reason why a man should wait for marriage before having sex that will actually make them marry for the right reasons.

Try a relationship

While men go for casual sex but many women try to find a serious relationship rather than just s^e^x. S^e^x does not necessarily mean that you are in a serious relationship that you need to decide what man really wants. If you find that a guy contact you on a regular basis and find ways to talk to you, then it could mean he wants a close relationship. However, it could be he just wants s^e^x only if you phone every few weeks for fun.

Keep out of having sex until you can find out what the man is really after. You should never feel like you want to rush into s^e^x with anyone who fancies you. It’s a good idea to find out what your man think sex means before deciding to sleep with him.

Reasons Why You Won’t Get Back Your Ex?

As people spend time together and the relationship grows, an emotional bond is built that keeps them together.. Hence when we breakup with someone that we love, immense pain is experienced. This drives us to do anything to take the pain away and get an ex love back.
It is wonderful goal to desire to get back with an ex lover. However a problem crops up when we become so obsessed with the thought of getting our ex lover back that everything else is blocked out. Obsession changes your personality totally.

get ex backEven when you are normally a calm and collected person, when obsessed with something you become nervous and agitated. The more you try to win your ex back, the more you fail. What is the solution then? Well, here is the reason why you are failing:
1.)  Your obsession of getting your ex back is puts a considerable amount of mental pressure on your ex. As you insist the pressure becomes more and more difficult to bear. If you do not stop he/she will eventually snap and lash out.
2.)  A broken relationship hurts everyone involved. When the emotional bond is broken a tear is left on the hearts of both parties. Much as it may be hard to believe that your ex is hurt, it is better to give them some time to heal. It does not help for you to get back together again prematurely while still hurting and then totally destroy any chance you may have of restoring your relationship.

Repeatedly showing your ex how desperate you are to get them back won’t allow your ex to get over the pain and bad feelings that caused the breakup to occur in the first place. Your efforts of getting your ex back prevents them from healing and prolongs the period needed for them to get back to positive feelings for you.
3.)  Your perception of things is clouded by your obsession and hence keeps you from logical decisions. You simply don’t know when to stop and keep going like a runaway train hurting everyone in its path. You are just unable to stop and consider the implications of your actions as you pursue your obsession. Your ex is just a shurt and shocked as you are.

The more aggressive you get by trying to reach him or her when all he or she needs is to stay away from you, the more rejection you get. He or she ends up lashing out in retaliation.
4.)  While obsessed with getting your ex back, a lot of things in your life are affected as well. It delays you from having a meaningful relationship with your ex again and also affects other aspects of your life. If you do not get your obsession in control you may end up with a personal disaster on your hands. You need to stop now before you totally destroy any chances of getting your ex back.
5.)  Obsessions are self centered and can not be considered an act of love. Love causes you to put the other person’s needs before yours and obsession does just the opposite. While obsessed all you care about is your needs. It is just plain selfish. Well, what then do you need to do to turn things around?

For a start understand that your ex needs space. When your ex finally comes back to you, he/she will be in a better space to rebuild the relationship.

get back your ex




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